The Me Inside....

Dear God, How could it have taken me almost twenty eight years to fully comprehend that no matter how far I go, no matter how long for... .... this heart still has a home. It may not always be in the greatest comfort, or in sheer convenience. It's the faith of knowing that whatever I do, or however deep I've fallen... I trust that Im gonna be alright.. The human side of me ache a lot. I see people so easily come and go, in and out Australia and NZ. When is my turn God? Dont You think I've waited long enough? Dont You think I've done all I could? Dont You know the pains of waiting in the dark? ... but I guess the capacity has been enlarged. I believe my time will come. some day... somehow.... This isn't home. But I'll be fine for a while.

Terimakasih Tuhan, ... untuk kesempatan itu. Walo kudu lembur2 ga puguh, walo kudu masuk di tanggal merah, walo sampe kekonci ga bisa kuar di dalem kedutaan saking malemnya, walo ga berani pipis pas lembur gara2 ditakut2in ada setan di wc, walo waktu tidur jadi dikit, walo kaki jadi pegel menjurus ke lemes, walo kaki rada lecet gara2 pake heels n lari2 whole day, walo keringetan ampe lepek di bawah matahari, walo kelaperan tiada tara dan tiada ada makanan, walo si item kayak jamban (tetep yg ini mah!), walo sempet dimaki2 pdhal yg salah bukan saya, walo badan pada lemes, walo mood jadi jelek gara2 cape n kurang bobo.. walo jadi sering kebelet pipis tapi ga bisa ke WC .... tapi semua itu worth banget! Makasih banget ya Tuhanku... super!! Terimakasih! karena aku dipilih buat ikut iring2an Motorcades. karena bisa ngerasain gimana rasanya di escort dengan full-squad polisi Indonesia dan para secret service of the United States of America. karena bisa jadi salah satu biang kerok kemacetan ...

Another funny thing about friendship.... ----- Forwarded Message ---- From: Marini Hendarmin <marini.hendarmin@bo-le.com> To: Candice <sparky008@yahoo.com> Sent: Friday, February 13, 2009 5:39:49 PM Subject: Re: emi goreng gua baru liat blog lu... ternyata lu udah post yeee??? AHHAEHAEHUAEHUE... pikiran kita samaa... ya udah karena lu udah post, gua gak usah....ahaeuaheuhaeuhuae.... ----- Original Message ----- From: Candice To: Marini Hendarmin Sent: Friday, February 13, 2009 5:27 PM Subject: Re: emi goreng HA?? Ko gitu gimana? eeh.. lu baru baca blog gua yaaa? hihihi.. emang ga bole di post? lu lagi nyindir ya? hihihihi From: Marini Hendarmin < marini.hendarmin@bo-le.com > To: Candice < sparky008@yahoo.com > Sent: Friday, February 13, 2009 5:21:31 PM Subject: Re: emi goreng ih kok gitu sih? ah gua mo post ah di blogku...lalalalala....   ----- Original Message ----- From: Candice To: Marini Hendarmin Sent...

Beginilah isi imel dua sahabat yang sama2 menggunakan waktu kerja untuk berbalas-balas imel. ... walo sebagian udah diedit, tapi beginilah kegiatan kami sehari2 dari senen-jumat. Subjek-nya "emi goreng" karena salah satu dari mereka minta dibawain emi goreng. Kenapa Abo milih gua sebagai Maid of Honour? ---- From: Marini Hendarmin marini.hendarmin@bo-le.com To : Candice sparky008@yahoo.com Sent: Friday, February 13, 2009 4:48:32 PM Subject: Re: emi goreng 1. krn lu org yg plg deket ama gua 2. krn lu yg plg bisa jaga rahasia 3. krn lu yg tau jelek n bagusnya gua 4. krn lu orang yg gua percaya 5. krn lu orang whom i can count on 6. krn we've been through a lot (read: A LOT) ups n downs 7. krn it's time you payback my service!wahahahauhuae 8. krn i wanna share the most happiest and dreamiest day in my life 9. just becoz i love you.... ps. sukurin lu lembur! ----- Original Message ----- From: Candice To: Marini Hendarmin Sent: Friday, February 13, 2009 4:29 PM Subject: R...

A friend gave me this famed McDonald's postcards that forms the above slogan… Now that I'm looking at it, the catchy tune bumps around in my head ... and I can't seem to push it off my mind! Yes I am enjoying myself tremendously, at least Im trying my best to. The new year has been good despite the irrationality of occasional stumbles that render the ride rough and bumpy. In the hectic rush of the season, I've managed to find peace of mind, I guess.. and perhaps that has greatly influenced the way I start to view things. What did I say my resolution was? Embrace life. I've been trying my utmost best to look at things in the brightest light possible, trying to seek that silver lining in every gloomy cloud that blocks my sight. Yesterday I learned something from a very good friend of mine. I've come to sort of realise that while sometimes, just sometimes.. .... things can go soo sour that you can't find a single glimmer of hope, that process of attempt in its...

Walked into TP's office and heard some classical music from his iPod. I freezed for split seconds, felt a sudden rush of indescribable peace. It's been years since I last listened to any of those. somehow the melodies are fading away from my life. I forgot. I forgot how it made me feel. ... how it used to make me fly, ... how it took me to mountain top, overseeing an endless carpet of greens. I forgot how much I loved classical. .