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Gue gila. Gila gue. gugugagaa

It's been a while since I updated, as usual.
I don't really have anything cohesive to write, just felt like writing something.

Im sitting here, sticky fingers outstretched in the empty chamber of my mind.
Feeling the stale air, brushing aside cobwebs (ingetin kudu suru Alia manjat besok, ada sawang dikit) and just, waving around... hoping some flotsam memory will stick to my fingers so that I can pull it out and jot it down.

There are times, like when I have a cup of coffee before stepping into the office,
... looking up at the sky and I see these huge clouds floating like air blips.
I don't know why but they've got my undivided attention.
They're so big like they don't belong up there, as though they're too big for the sky.

And Im looking up at them and the scene from my peripheral vision slows down to match their speed.
I can almost feel my mind travelling with them except, I can't be.
... because my eyes are stationary, aren't they?

Or the times when Im playing the piano, or listening to music.
Music has a strange way of alienating me from the world,
it's so... encapsulated, (if there such word).
It fills my mind and the next thing I know,
... it feels like Im looking through two peepholes into another world,
and I wonder at this world,
and I wonder at the lives that occupy this world even though Im detached from all of it.

Sometimes, it's good to 'float around' for a while.
Looking at some lives (according to mine) from a different angle.
*sigh*.. if only I have wings, I'd fly away.

Ah.
Pergi jauh.
Terbang tinggi.

Aku
...... hanya ingin bebas.

*************************

Few days ago SL txt me, said that Adrian had an accident and seriously injured.
According to the blog that Chin Chin wrote, he had 5 broken ribs, a fractured diagraphm and injury to his liver.

He's gone through an open surgery on Sat morning, and the internal bleeding has stopped.
Thank God for that, but he's been unconscious for days...
It's good to know that many ppl are praying for him. In fact, quite sure the whole congregations are praying for him.

If anything bad happen to me, I wonder how many ppl will pray for me.

*************************

I've turned 26 about....... 70 hours ago I think.
Life has a funny way of taking some twists and turns, but here I am.
I've somewhat lived for almost three decades.
It doesn't feel that long.

Went to Bandung with Andi to celebrate my bday.
Just us both.
Had a very very lovely dinner at The Peak, a really neat place.
Worth the long jorney and definately worth every pennies.

*************************

This post is soooooo un-structured.
My mind is jumping here and there.

Saya sebal.
Saya bingung.
Saya berharap.
Saya berdoa.
Saya lelah.
Saya besukur.
Saya merasa bersalah.
Saya takut.
Saya sedih.
Saya bahagia.

Tau aaahh!

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