Here we go...
After days of being not in the mood of typing,
this morning I woke up and felt like it.
Something happened on Friday and Saturday.
On Friday night,
I realized that I've got so much hurt inside.
Learning to let it go,
sebenernya gw agak kaget pas Luciana tiba2 aja came to me and said :
Anggap aku cici-mu ya...
gapapa, kamu boleh cerita kok.
Then she simply hugged me.
Didn't say anything.
Maaaan, my weakness lays in hugs ay?
I just melted.
It felt good.
It really did.
Saturday was different though.
I felt numb most of the time.
Maybe gara2 lack of sleep kali ya?
Practically didn't sleep the whole night,
... dilema between mo pegi kerja or ikut RE.
Ahirnya jam 6 pagi,
I've made a decision to go for RE.
I told God that I just wanna be set free.
Tapi kenapa ya all I felt was numbness?
------------------------------------------------------------------
On A Totally Different Subject,
Had a 20 minutes talk with bro on Friday nite.
.. and that 20 minutes will have to do for the rest of the week.
provided if he comes next weekend, which I doubt.
If he doesn't, then that 20 minutes will have to do for the next 2 weeks.
He seems to have something up every weekend.
When he first got married,
he came on Friday, Saturday, Sunday then Monday morning he'd go to work.
Then as time goes by,
he came on Saturday, Sunday, then Monday morning he'd go to work.
Then times continue,
he came on Saturday and Sunday only.
Time keeps on going,
he came on Saturday and Sunday in every alternate week.
*and mind you, he stays in his room most of the time*
And he told me that it is not the quantity,
... but the quality that counts.
He's got a point.
Let's do the math, shall we?
24 hrs in a day x 60 secs in a minutes = 1440 minutes.
1440 minutes in a day x 14 days in 2 weeks = 20160 mnts.
Yea, I guess he's right.
We can have a very very good quality time in 20 mnts out of 20160 mnts.
Whoo-hooo! Let's shed tears and have a blast!
I came home at 6 pm yesterday,
just so that I can spend more time with him.
And I've planned to not going to church to today,
just so that I can go breakfast and probably some walks around the mall with him.
Guess wat? I came home to find out that he's gone.
He went home already.
Mami bilang sih katanya di rumahnya lagi ada Rusdi dari Bandung.
So he has to entertain him loh..
I feel so dumb.
He's my bro, I love him to bits!
It's just that sometimes,
I forgot that he's got a wife .... and a dog.
He's got other priority.
I shouldn't have demanded so much.
He started his own family now.
And Andi bilang marriage is like building your own country.
Your country must come first above any other.
Which is true.
Emang sih waktunya bentrok mulu.
Pas gw dirumah, dia ga ada.
Pas gw ga dirumah, dia ada.
Biasanya juga gw gapapa kok.
It's just lately I feel so alone in everything.
.. and maybe Im just looking for some punching bag.
And he happens to be my choice of bag.
Lagian orang laen juga ga puya masalah about this.
Sisi cuek2 aja tuh kalo ga ketemu ngko2nya.
Abo cuek2 aja tuh kalo ga ketemu nci-nya. (seneng malah ya bo? heuhguaug)
So, no big deal.
It's just me and my insignificant ramblings.
Ya udalah... laper gue.
After days of being not in the mood of typing,
this morning I woke up and felt like it.
Something happened on Friday and Saturday.
On Friday night,
I realized that I've got so much hurt inside.
Learning to let it go,
sebenernya gw agak kaget pas Luciana tiba2 aja came to me and said :
Anggap aku cici-mu ya...
gapapa, kamu boleh cerita kok.
Then she simply hugged me.
Didn't say anything.
Maaaan, my weakness lays in hugs ay?
I just melted.
It felt good.
It really did.
Saturday was different though.
I felt numb most of the time.
Maybe gara2 lack of sleep kali ya?
Practically didn't sleep the whole night,
... dilema between mo pegi kerja or ikut RE.
Ahirnya jam 6 pagi,
I've made a decision to go for RE.
I told God that I just wanna be set free.
Tapi kenapa ya all I felt was numbness?
------------------------------------------------------------------
On A Totally Different Subject,
Had a 20 minutes talk with bro on Friday nite.
.. and that 20 minutes will have to do for the rest of the week.
provided if he comes next weekend, which I doubt.
If he doesn't, then that 20 minutes will have to do for the next 2 weeks.
He seems to have something up every weekend.
When he first got married,
he came on Friday, Saturday, Sunday then Monday morning he'd go to work.
Then as time goes by,
he came on Saturday, Sunday, then Monday morning he'd go to work.
Then times continue,
he came on Saturday and Sunday only.
Time keeps on going,
he came on Saturday and Sunday in every alternate week.
*and mind you, he stays in his room most of the time*
And he told me that it is not the quantity,
... but the quality that counts.
He's got a point.
Let's do the math, shall we?
24 hrs in a day x 60 secs in a minutes = 1440 minutes.
1440 minutes in a day x 14 days in 2 weeks = 20160 mnts.
Yea, I guess he's right.
We can have a very very good quality time in 20 mnts out of 20160 mnts.
Whoo-hooo! Let's shed tears and have a blast!
I came home at 6 pm yesterday,
just so that I can spend more time with him.
And I've planned to not going to church to today,
just so that I can go breakfast and probably some walks around the mall with him.
Guess wat? I came home to find out that he's gone.
He went home already.
Mami bilang sih katanya di rumahnya lagi ada Rusdi dari Bandung.
So he has to entertain him loh..
I feel so dumb.
He's my bro, I love him to bits!
It's just that sometimes,
I forgot that he's got a wife .... and a dog.
He's got other priority.
I shouldn't have demanded so much.
He started his own family now.
And Andi bilang marriage is like building your own country.
Your country must come first above any other.
Which is true.
Emang sih waktunya bentrok mulu.
Pas gw dirumah, dia ga ada.
Pas gw ga dirumah, dia ada.
Biasanya juga gw gapapa kok.
It's just lately I feel so alone in everything.
.. and maybe Im just looking for some punching bag.
And he happens to be my choice of bag.
Lagian orang laen juga ga puya masalah about this.
Sisi cuek2 aja tuh kalo ga ketemu ngko2nya.
Abo cuek2 aja tuh kalo ga ketemu nci-nya. (seneng malah ya bo? heuhguaug)
So, no big deal.
It's just me and my insignificant ramblings.
Ya udalah... laper gue.
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