A LITTLE..... INSIGHT
I dream. I dream most of the time.
And you would've thought that I'd finally get used to telling the difference between what's real... and what isn't. I have to be honest with you : I never cease to amaze myself.
I want more.
How do you walk away from your own, great, expectations? What kind, persuasive words would you string together? How can you not follow your heart? How can you simply ignore?
That painful......... longing.
I have the tendency to shy away from the mirror every once in a while. To remind myself that the other side of me has not been lost. To surface, for a breath of air.
But everytime I do, Im overwhelmed by a vision of what's about to happen next.
A feeling. A premonition. A mere glance, an abstract painting of the future. Deja Vu is when I've relived that moment and I can tell you exactly what sort of colours have been used.
And I must say..... it's not alway a very pretty sight.
Remorse isn't, either. It is too strong a feeling,
...... too painful an emotion to bear.
And I keep telling myself that this has not been a mistake.
..... that this never was.
But how do you compensate for the one thing that's missing?
Which fear would you rather live?
Coz at this very moment..... Im not sure about everything.
Not about my love, not about my state of mind,
not about my sanity, not about what I want, not about my future,
And the most depressing is this:
Im not sure about my dreams.... anymore.
Im not sure the promise.
Can someone tell me that what ever happened in the past...... were meant to happen?
... that everything under the sky happen for a reason?
... that God has a plan, not to harm me... but to give hope and future.
Can someone tell me that things are gonna be alright?
I know.
but it's just that.....
I need to hear it.
I just do.
I dream. I dream most of the time.
And you would've thought that I'd finally get used to telling the difference between what's real... and what isn't. I have to be honest with you : I never cease to amaze myself.
I want more.
How do you walk away from your own, great, expectations? What kind, persuasive words would you string together? How can you not follow your heart? How can you simply ignore?
That painful......... longing.
I have the tendency to shy away from the mirror every once in a while. To remind myself that the other side of me has not been lost. To surface, for a breath of air.
But everytime I do, Im overwhelmed by a vision of what's about to happen next.
A feeling. A premonition. A mere glance, an abstract painting of the future. Deja Vu is when I've relived that moment and I can tell you exactly what sort of colours have been used.
And I must say..... it's not alway a very pretty sight.
Remorse isn't, either. It is too strong a feeling,
...... too painful an emotion to bear.
And I keep telling myself that this has not been a mistake.
..... that this never was.
But how do you compensate for the one thing that's missing?
Which fear would you rather live?
Coz at this very moment..... Im not sure about everything.
Not about my love, not about my state of mind,
not about my sanity, not about what I want, not about my future,
And the most depressing is this:
Im not sure about my dreams.... anymore.
Im not sure the promise.
Can someone tell me that what ever happened in the past...... were meant to happen?
... that everything under the sky happen for a reason?
... that God has a plan, not to harm me... but to give hope and future.
Can someone tell me that things are gonna be alright?
I know.
but it's just that.....
I need to hear it.
I just do.
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